This is definitely the hardest post I’ve ever had to write. I’d much prefer to go somewhere, a long, long way away and crawl deep into a cave or under a huge rock, away from everyone and everything, rather than facing all of you on a day like today. But I know that running away from it, and from all of you, my friends, my community is the worst thing I could do… after all, you all loved her too.

And what in the world am I talking about? Lucy. My companion for the past 9 years, friend, first “kid”, the sweetest and most loving dog I’ve ever known. Who wouldn’t love her (other than the mailman, of course). You see, yesterday, Lucy passed away. I wish I could say it was just from old age, or some other natural cause, but no… the truth is she died in the back of my car. I brought her in to work yesterday, just like I have almost every day for the past 3 ½ years, but for some insane, unknown reason, I forgot her there. The day got hot, and away she went.

I can’t begin to explain the amount of pain that I’m in – sorrow, guilt, shame, bewilderment, fear, anger, pity, anguish. It feels like a huge hole has been ripped out of my gut, and nothing will ever, ever replace it. Yes, I know life goes on, and that I will get past this, but right now it hurts more than anything.

I’m writing all of this to all of you because you all knew and loved Lucy too, and I know you’ll miss her. I thought it fitting to write a workout for Lucy… she loved the gym and everyone in it… and I know how much she loved to run, skip, and jump around the gym… I’d like to honor her this way. Lets make tomorrow, Friday, June 27th, Lucy’s day.



“Lucy”
For time:
400m Run
40 Burpees
400m Skip
40 Squat Cleans – 95 lbs
400m Broad Jump
40 Sumo Deadlift High Pulls – 95 lbs
400m Run
40 Dips

---

I miss her already.

:(

EK

Thanks for sharing that Andy. That was incredibly courageous and we all loved that sweet girl very much. My love and condolences to you and Julia. Lucy will be missed.

"Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers the o'er-fraught heart and bids it break. "
~William Shakespeare

Andy, thank you for sharing. I ditto Stanwyck, "that was incredibly courageous". My heart goes out to you, Julia and Dash. I can't imagine the pain you must be going through. Know that we love you and are here for you if you need anything. Lucy, we will miss you sitting on our feet and watching you chase your tail. You were the sweetest dog.

I am so sorry... Lucy was part of a community I have come to love.

I be doing the "Lucy" from home tomorrow.


-Ryan

Wow. I am so sorry for your loss Andy. Lucy was loved by all of us. I will miss her.

Vanessa

Andy, I'm so sorry for your loss. Lucy was such a sweet soul. She was the first Petranek I met when I joined the gym...and she was often the first one to greet me before classes...and her warm greetings and many kisses helped calm my nerves for the grueling tasks ahead. She will be sorely missed.

- Matt Wagner

Andy,

We've never met. I'm just a CrossFitter surfing the affiliate sites. I'm SO sorry to read that and agree that it was very courageous for you to post. That's the kind of pain and guilt that will never be fully erased but please remember that we're human and we make mistakes. I'm sure Lucy knows that, too! I'm also sure she forgives you so please forgive yourself.

God bless,

Andy-

My heart goes out to you and your family. i cried when I heard.I love Lucy and will miss her very much. Thank you for being truthful about the situation. I'm so sorry it happened this way and I can understand the amount of pain you and your family are suffering. Lucy will be missed.

With Compassion,
Sondra

Andy, I don't know what to say other than I am very sorry. You are one of my favorite people and one of the best humans I know. Of all the people I know there isn't one who hasn't had a lapse in judgement or been preoccupied and forgot something of great importance.

Love you man.

Lucy was a good dog.

I'm sorry for your loss Andy and family.

From 14th & Colorodo to doggie heaven
We will miss you Amelia, Julian & Kevin.

Andy,
So very sorry for your loss. My heart pours out to you and your family. I don't think I ever met Lucy in the 3 times I have visited Petranek. Pets enrich our lives in so many ways but most of all they teach to unconditionally love and be loved. I am 100% positive that Lucy's love for you endures and your love for her and the memories you had together will continue to bring joy to your life, even after she is gone. Trust in that as you grieve her passing.

My thought are with you and your family.

All the best,
Corrine Brenner
(& Michael Dimitruk)
San Francisco Crossfit

There is nothing to say but we are with you. I had to put my 9 year old dog to sleep two weeks ago, and it hurts. Life goes on, and you obviously will not have to go on alone.

Andy, Julia - deeply sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you both.

Valla

HEY MY GOOD FRIEND ANDY,

I WENT THRU THE SAME NOT TOO LONG AGO SO I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU. WE ALL WILL MISS HER BUT MOSTLY REMEMBER HER FOR THE GOOD TIMES WE HAD WITH HER. MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU AND YOUR FAMILY...

Andy-your blog confirms what I already know about you: your strength of character, compassion, and sense of responsibility are unsurpassed. My heart goes out to you, Julia, Dash, and Daisy. xoxo Jocelyn

Andy and Julia,

I am so deeply sorry for the loss of Lucy. She was a great dog. She will be missed by all of us that workout at the gym. I love you guys.

Marc.

Andy,
Thank you for sharing this truly painful experience. Stay strong, stay courageous and remember, she knows it was only an accident and she'll be smiling down on us tomorrow while we honor her and ease some of the sadness with "The Lucy."
Much love,
Alyssa

http://www.laanimalservices.com/aboutani_hotweather.htm

Do not leave your pet alone in the car. Not only is it dangerous, it is now illegal in California. Senate Bill 1806, which became law January 1, 2007, says no animal may be left unattended in a vehicle under conditions that "endanger the health or well-being of an animal due to heat, cold, lack of adequate ventilation, lack of food or water, or other circumstances that could reasonably be expected to cause suffering, disability, or death to the animal." Pet owners who leave their animals unattended under dangerous conditions could face fines, jail time or both.

Sending you love, peace and light. I encourage you to be gentle with yourself as you celebrate the life of the sweet soul of Lucy and grieve her loss. We all know how much you and your family loved and cared for Lucy..and she knows, too! You're a beautiful soul, Andy. I'm honored to know you and to have shared so many fond memories with sweet Lucy. She will always live in our hearts.

Goodbye Lucy.
We will all miss you. Andy, Julia, Dash and Daisy my thoughts are with you! Lucy was a very gentle and kind dog and I'm sad to hear she is gone. She will not be forgotten.

Andy, you are very courageous for sharing this and I admire that. We are all here for you!

I will do the Lucy with all my heart tomorrow!

Shirley

Andy,
I too admire the strength it took to share your loss with all of us. We all have momentary lapses from time to time that can result in tragedy and it's just sheer luck that they don't. Lucy was always fun to see at the gym and we all appreciated you sharing her with us. We'll all get through the loss together.
Jim

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.

There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.

The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

Andy,

I'm sad for your loss.

I never really felt that I was a "dog person"; however Lucy was so sweet that I understood exactly what it meant. You are fortunate to have had a companion like Lucy.

This as such a paradoxical event. You made a painful confession to everyone how a simple mental lapse resulted in a tragedy. But, it is because of the character and personal integrity you demonstrated that this moment is greater than only the loss of Lucy.

You have my admiration. Thanks Andy.

Andy, I'm so sorry.

Oh Andy, I'm SO very sorry! Lucy was such a wonderful dog. Her spirit will no doubt fill the gym for a long time to come. Please don't be too hard on yourself...this could have happened to any one of us. Know that you have built a great gym community that you can lean on at a time like this when you need support. I will miss Lucy...she didn't try to lick me every second of the day like Daisy does! She thought of me as more than just a human salt-lick, but cocked her head thinking, "Is that all you got? Sheesh, if I was human, I'd toast your sorry a$$"...I believe that's what she's saying to all of us from her bathroom photo. I'll be honored to attempt The Lucy tomorrow morning.

Andy:

I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved Lucy.

Andy, my heart goes out to you. One thing is for sure, this could have happened to ANYONE. We all feel your pain and bewilderment in the wake of this awful, freak accident. See you soon, and please keep sharing your feelings. Your openness and vulnerability are inspiring.

We are a family and send lots of love your way. LOTS of it. Hats off to beloved Lucy.

Andy-
I'm sorry for your loss, but am relieved that you are ok. When I read your first paragraph, I worried that you were going to tell us you were in ill health. Stay strong. You'll make it through this.

Everybody has said everything that I can possible think to say here... So, I will just say this: Lucy was a great part of our PF community, as is Daisy! I will truly miss her. I am a dog person, and I love to have them around. Unfortunately, I am not allowed to have one where I live, so I take pride in calling your girls my girls too!

I also respect the hell out of you for the way that you decided to handle this situation; open and honestly. That takes real guts! This is just another way that you lead by example.

Thank you!

Jonesy

Andy
It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault. I know that losing a pet is like losing a family member. You did not do this out of neglect or cruelty and there's no doubt in my mind that Lucy knew this. Lucy's vibrance was a reflection of the kindness and love you and your family showed her. She obviously loved you very very much. Sometimes things happen in a way that is very painful and that we don't understand. Maybe there's a puppy out there being born right now that is meant to be loved by your family. I don't know. But be sure to honor her by grieving for her. She wouldn't want you to suffer by holding onto your guilt and grief and pain. She wouldn't want you to hurt forever. She would want you to be happy. That's what love is and that's what she felt for you.

Andy. I'm sorry dude.

-c

Andy:

I'm so sorry to hear about this. Sorry for you, your family, Lucy and all the people who loved her. She will be missed.

Andy,

I am so sorry to hear about Lucy’s passing. Her gentleness and kindness will be fondly remembered and missed. I deeply respect your strength and honesty in this very difficult moment.

Sincerely,
Nazareth

A Haiku for Lucy:

Sweet girl, dressed in black
Loyal, Caring, Had the knack.
To always love back.

Andy & the whole extended Petranek family,
I am so sorry for our loss. She will be missed. Accidents do happen and sometimes our emotional limits are tested. Like it's been said many times today, Andy you showed great character as you always do. I have never met a man like you and I feel honored to have had you in my life. Please try to forgive yourself.
My condolences go out to you, Julia, Dash and Daisy in this time of hardship. This too shall pass. I love you and hold you in my heart.

So Sorry to hear about Lucy. I know how much she meant to you and Julia. How could she not. She was the first face I met at Petranek and made me smile. Friday we'll celebrate all she gave to all of us. we're all gonna miss her.

I have 3 babies of my own. I can only imagine your pain.

My sincerest condolences.

Andy, we are so sorry for your loss. :(

having just put my 14 year old lab to sleep in december, i know what it's like to lose a family member. i'm sure lucy and herschel are playing together right now in a beautiful field with a cold lake nearby to cool off in.

my sincere condolences.

Hey Andy,
As a lover and owner of pets, I just wanted to drop a note to express my condolences. That's rough, man. Lucy was awesome. And a star! Remember, she was in our CF video online. =)

Eric

Andy, others have already expressed my thoughts with far more eloquence than I could. But please do know that I add my sympathies for your loss and my admiration for your strength of character to the mix.

Val

you dont know me but my heart goes out to you. I just lost my little girl of 8 years. i feel your heartache. my prayers to you and your family.

Dear Andy,

My first exposure to CrossFit was from the M&F;article and video in which you participated. I remember you writing that you were ecstatic about the fact that Lucy made the final cut of the video. My sincerest condolences on the loss of Lucy.
I quit my recreational weightlifting routine and became a CrossFitter after reading the M&F;article and watching the video. I regularly read your blog because, in my opinion, it has some of the most effective, creative, and carefully planned WODs. You also post links to informative literature that I enjoy reading enormously. Your undeniable strength, both physical and from a personality standpoint, will get you through tough segment of life. We have never met, and I have never walked into your gym, but you have had a substantial positive impact on my well being through your practice. I'm sure many others can say the same. As an absent minded scientist, I can identify with the type of mistake you made. However, constantly thinking back about those mistakes with regret would not be a way for me to live. Learn from your mistakes, leave them behind, and live a better life.

I'll miss my friend Lucy but will remember the joy she brought into my life and doubtless yours and all the members of the PF community. I echo others who've commented on your courage in sharing this, but hope this makes the healing process that much easier.

Andy, I met Lucy last month and gave her some love - she was a sweet sweet girl and I'm so sorry for what you're going through. My heart is hurting right now for you and everyone else who loved her. My thoughts and deepest condolences, Sierra

Andy, your strength of character during such a traumatic time is exemplary. I lost a beloved pet under circumstances that left me questioning myself, and it sure can add an extra layer of hurt to the loss of an animal friend. I send my sympathies and good thoughts to you, and am confident that you will find comfort in this extraordinary community that you have inspired.

Andy, there's no question you loved that dog and gave her a wonderful life. That was obvious to all of us. There are so many abused, neglected dogs in our society. Thousands of animals are put down annually in LA County alone. You provided Lucy with years of love and affection and there is no question that dog was aware of that every minute of her life. You are true animal lover and a person of great character, who inspires so many of us. That is what really matters.

Crying for a dog I never knew. I can't imagine the pain and guilt you feel. God bless you all.

Andy-

I write to you with tears streaming down my face. I am so sorry. Forgive yourself. Lucy knows how much you love her.

Darcy

"We are put on this Earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are always there for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you."

Jeff Warner

Andy- you've always been there for us. It's our turn to be there for you. As a dog lover, I can't imagine your hurt. Call anytime you need to talk.

Your long lost student,

Lisa Stein

Lucy will be in all our hearts and minds forever. And you will be there right next to her. You are a wonderful person and loved by all of us.

With Love, Curt

Thinking about you and all the other folks at the gym. Keep breathing!

Another long lost student...but one who thinks about you and your gym daily-

You are in my thoughts-

Jen Middleton

Lucy was the first one I met at Petranek Fitness when I first came to visit. Sending good thoughts your way Andy.

Andy

I can't imagine the pain that you (and Julia) must be in right now. They say there's nothing worse than losing a child, and I'm guessing that this is not far from what you're going through. I'm certain Lucy had a great life with you, and that's more than can be said for many animals. Hope to see you and Julia soon (and Dash too).

sincerely
Lenny

andy,

my chest tightened up reading that...the regret, guilt, and grief is hard to imagine. it was always apparent how tight you were with lucy, and i guess that makes it more painful. so sorry to hear about this. hang tight.

cho

Dear Andy and Julie and the Petranek CF family -

I am so sorry for your loss.
Someone else already wrote it: Forgive yourself.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Susan

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